I think it goes without saying it's difficult to write creatively when you're in the middle of major life changes and everything seemingly is just swirling around you. (Much like it appears on screen when Frodo puts on the "one ring" in the Lord of the Ring trilogy and everything goes sorta slow motion and blurry and fragmented.)
Over the next few months I'll be gradually updating my blog here and shifting my topics from surface..fun and frivolity to a more comprehensive approach with more real life application to how I'm embracing life more fully...openly...with full regard for feeling/cognitive/intellectual and heart-mind comprehension all involved and at play.
I have rarely if ever publicly touched on the topic of being gay...but I'm going to allow myself more freedom to express this part of my life in the hopes that it will help others embrace their truth as well, whatever that may be. Honestly and openness begets honesty and openness.
Also, I recently admitted to myself that I had a drinking problem. Rarely did a night go by that I wasn't drinking in the last...oh I dunno...15 years. Beer, wine and whiskey were my friends. That country song "a long-necked ice cold beer never broke my heart" is in fact very true. Beer doesn't break your heart...you break your own heart...in an effort to cope with the pain, hurt and trauma that you find in your lap. So having recognized that I am not only harming myself...but also others all around me..I choose me now. I choose to reach toward myself...hold myself up...love myself...and become the greatness that I know is within me.
I'm not going to kid myself here and think that simply stating these things makes it so. I know to say "and that's a wrap" would be a lie here. There is much work to do...much darkness and shadow to uncover and grapple with and understand and find compassion for...so be it. This is the way.
Onward and upward!
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