I had just finished doing some work clearing brush from an embankment on some very wild and rustic mountain property and paused for a few moments to bathe in the surrounding silence. While working I had noticed that I could hear traffic noises from I-26 (very deep and low truck sounds), which was a little surprising because I was quite a few miles from the highway. (Sound travels and bounces around in odd ways in the mountains.) But from this...I began to isolate each sound I heard...an airplane overhead, the distant silence among the trees, the trickling sounds from the creek below, down to the point that I heard a single leaf rustle across the bank in front of me. From this...I decided to intently listen and bask in these quiet stirrings. (Mostly because you never know what you might hear whispered on the wind...an adventure in and of itself.)
I leaned up again a very large rock that was on the bank overlooking a lovely rippling creek and was suddenly captivated by this tiny leaf skeleton laying there right in front of me. I immediately wondered just how long this leaf had been laying there in order to turn into this shell of itself? I didn’t dare touch it because I instinctively knew it would disintegrate right before my eyes.
The intricacies and delicateness of each and every vein, now fully visible and in great detail was breathtaking! Now paired down to the very bones of the leaf. How long did this unraveling take?
Time didn’t seem to matter here. The details were what mattered.
There was a familiarity to me with this intricate and yet very complex pairing down from what used to be this leaf...to what this leaf was now. Bare bones.
It is very clear to me that many of us are smack in the middle of a “pairing down” phase in our lives. The sorting and clearing and de-cluttering, some things even have been ripped out from under us seemingly without our having any real choice in the matter. To sit within the feeling of what we used to feel like...to how it feels now...so very different...yet also from deep within it all...there is a “freeing” feeling. Maybe some of the heaviness is gone...maybe things feel a bit lighter.
With the things we are able to sort through...each and every decision is based upon…“Do I really need this anymore? Does it hold the same purpose it once did?”
From within what I’m describing here...you might be able to tell (much like the leaf) that sometimes we find ourselves stuck on a rock with no choice but to change into the next version of ourselves. Like a leveling up.
Remember those old video games where you moved from left to right as you progressed through the game? Each level has a progression of difficulty and challenge that came with it. And if you died...you had to start over, back at the very beginning of that level again. And always...ALWAYS near the end of each level was a very difficult challenge. And when you finally beat that level there was a brief moment of victory before you started the next level. But...because you learned and grew and expanded your ability to navigate the challenges in that level...the start of the next level was a smidge easier only because you’d made it through that last big intense challenge at the end of the last one.
Human crisis and challenge is where we learn the most about humaning. When the stress levels are high...when we are exhausted...when we falter at the face of another decision to be made...but as always...the intensity passes...we get through it...and then comes the sorting after. The flicking off of details that are no longer necessary for us to continue to carry on our journey.
We’re left with the bare bones. And there’s beauty there. So much beauty.
Photo Credit: me in the wild mountain rustic air standing next to a rock by the creek
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